School Life - Sixth Grade

On my first day of Sixth Grade I was early and I met with my teachers. They were both very nice. I was put in a "slower learning" class despite being highly intelligent and a quick learner. Both of my teachers were confused why i was there. I had the math skills of a high school senior and the vocabulary level of one in college, yet I was in slower learning classes.

I went through much of the same, being taught things I already knew, but this time I was given advanced material by my teachers to work on separately. I was thrilled. I was actually learning something in school again. I had choir in this year. I have an okay singing range and voice but I was worried about singing in public, so I didn't. I sung once. My class being people who were slow learners and rowdy, where very annoying and loud. I couldn't take it most of the time. I would put my head down and drive my thumb into my middle finger while they yelled.

I got into a few altercations in this year. A boy spat on me. I don't know why. I stayed out of others business and tried to stay by myself as much as I could, but I was always a target. The boy who spat on me highly annoyed me. I started to strangle him, someone grabbed me from behind and insisted he punch me, but he didn't. I went back to class as if nothing happened. The teacher told me I can't go around fighting people when they do something like that, but she said he deserved it, and smiled. Another boy used to stick his finger in my face all the time, I grabbed it and tried to break it but I was stopped.

At lunch time I was picked on, people would say things about me, but I did have one friend. I don't remember his name now, but we got along. I used to lecture people in gym class about science, no one listened much. I hated gym, I never got dressed and just sat on the bleachers.

At lunch again! I got side tracked, at lunch I got into a fight. I accidentally popped a button on a boys shirt so he came over and punched me in the head. He punched me about five times. While he was punching me I was thinking the whole time. "Why is he doing this, what is happening?" He walked away after that, and I punched him in the back of his head. He fell and I got picked up by the dean. I don't remember her name but she was fighting cancer and had a few legions on her face, she lost her fight four years later. I liked her, we had to write about what we did. I didn't think I did anything wrong. My parents had to go to school and it was very bothersome. I didn't tell my parents they had to come to school until the next morning.

There was a girl, Christina, whom I hated. She used to bother me all the time and would put her finger in my face. I grabbed her wrist when I got to my breaking point and forced her to the ground until she apologized. I didn't get in trouble for this. Another boy who did the same thing (sixth grade was pull of face pointers) I punched in the stomach.

I made another friend during sixth grade now that I think about it. He was nice to me and we talked sometimes. That's about it. I got an award during this grade for straight A+'s on all my English reports. Math and Science although my passion, I did horribly. I never did homework. I passed sixth grade and went onto an advanced seventh grade class. Although it was an advanced class I still felt everyone wasn't that smart and my classes were still simple.

Faces

I can't read expressions. It's a pretty typical problem. I was speaking to my cousin yesterday and he made a face that I didn't understand. Shortly after I laughed a fake laugh of course, but then I had to think about it. I don't think my laugh was correct and I spent a long time going over in my head his expression. I get so frustrated when I can't read expressions, I rarely can anyway, but it still bothers me. I'm a very analytical person, and I calculate everything I'm going to do based off the situation. If I can't gather information from an expression I don't know how to react. I end up pausing at times in the middle of face to face conversation.

People have a tendency to say things while showing a face that doesn't correlate with what they're saying. At least I think so, so it just annoys me.

A quick post

I don't know why I find this so significant to post, but I just got off the phone with one of my friends (1 out of 2). She's one of those high emotional types. Very often we get into arguments. I always ask for her to explain why she's so worked up. Usually I can tell what happened, I just never understand why "that" made her upset or annoyed even if I know what it was. It's very frustrating indeed.

I love her but I just can't stand talking to her sometimes. She's usually complaining about something that annoyed her or bothered her, and oh my god, there are so many things. Or she's going on and on about some guy and a new relationship. I just stop listening usually and make little noises of acknowledgement, such as: Uh huh, yeah, (fake laugh), oh.

She's one of my very very few friends, so I can't do much besides tell her about all of this. When I do though, she just complains about how I'm rude and all. I'm not rude, I am just honest.

Unfortunately, I have the stereotypical lack of empathy and sympathy to people. I have much empathy to my pets though, and to movie characters. People though... most of the times, I just can't relate. Even in logical relatable situations, I just can't relate at all.

Question:

Why do people want dishonest friends?