Monday, September 27, 2010

School Life - Sixth Grade

On my first day of Sixth Grade I was early and I met with my teachers. They were both very nice. I was put in a "slower learning" class despite being highly intelligent and a quick learner. Both of my teachers were confused why i was there. I had the math skills of a high school senior and the vocabulary level of one in college, yet I was in slower learning classes.

I went through much of the same, being taught things I already knew, but this time I was given advanced material by my teachers to work on separately. I was thrilled. I was actually learning something in school again. I had choir in this year. I have an okay singing range and voice but I was worried about singing in public, so I didn't. I sung once. My class being people who were slow learners and rowdy, where very annoying and loud. I couldn't take it most of the time. I would put my head down and drive my thumb into my middle finger while they yelled.

I got into a few altercations in this year. A boy spat on me. I don't know why. I stayed out of others business and tried to stay by myself as much as I could, but I was always a target. The boy who spat on me highly annoyed me. I started to strangle him, someone grabbed me from behind and insisted he punch me, but he didn't. I went back to class as if nothing happened. The teacher told me I can't go around fighting people when they do something like that, but she said he deserved it, and smiled. Another boy used to stick his finger in my face all the time, I grabbed it and tried to break it but I was stopped.

At lunch time I was picked on, people would say things about me, but I did have one friend. I don't remember his name now, but we got along. I used to lecture people in gym class about science, no one listened much. I hated gym, I never got dressed and just sat on the bleachers.

At lunch again! I got side tracked, at lunch I got into a fight. I accidentally popped a button on a boys shirt so he came over and punched me in the head. He punched me about five times. While he was punching me I was thinking the whole time. "Why is he doing this, what is happening?" He walked away after that, and I punched him in the back of his head. He fell and I got picked up by the dean. I don't remember her name but she was fighting cancer and had a few legions on her face, she lost her fight four years later. I liked her, we had to write about what we did. I didn't think I did anything wrong. My parents had to go to school and it was very bothersome. I didn't tell my parents they had to come to school until the next morning.

There was a girl, Christina, whom I hated. She used to bother me all the time and would put her finger in my face. I grabbed her wrist when I got to my breaking point and forced her to the ground until she apologized. I didn't get in trouble for this. Another boy who did the same thing (sixth grade was pull of face pointers) I punched in the stomach.

I made another friend during sixth grade now that I think about it. He was nice to me and we talked sometimes. That's about it. I got an award during this grade for straight A+'s on all my English reports. Math and Science although my passion, I did horribly. I never did homework. I passed sixth grade and went onto an advanced seventh grade class. Although it was an advanced class I still felt everyone wasn't that smart and my classes were still simple.

School Life - Fourth and Fifth Grade

Fourth Grade was the beginning of my downfall. I was thrust into a class with all new people and a teacher who didn't understand me. She was a first year teacher and foolishly listened to my kindergarten teacher's comments about me, those being "i'm a problem child" and to "watch out for me". I didn't know anyone, and I tried to get to know others but it didn't work well. The kids ending up hating me and everyone talked bad about me. Several times they tried to jump me, but I was good at protecting myself.

I hated my teacher, she didn't seem intelligent. I was educating her about things she was teaching in history, which I found ridiculous. I lost all respect for her but I didn't show this through disrespect. I was still respectful, but I made sure to insert little tid bits into the lesson after class. I never raised my hand, I was too scared to speak in front of others.

At times I would get too overworked in the classroom. It was loud and there were always kids screaming and yelling and talking. I often just asked for a bathroom pass and went walking around the school building for 10-15 minutes. The building was pretty big. I'd get back to class, sit down, and do whatever I wanted. It was usually related to what the class was studying, just more advanced. I did a lot of studying outside of school too, it's all I did. 


Fifth Grade was my last year in elementary school and my worst. My teacher taugh all the classes and she only taught one type of class. Math. I loved math before her but it was too much. I also enjoyed English and I barely got a chance to do it in the class. The teacher didn't like me, the science teacher who came by twice a week didn't like me. I used to correct my science teacher on things and he called me "bitchy" to the entire class. He also once grabbed me by my arm when I was in front of class and erased something he did wrong and corrected it. I went straight to the principal's office and told him about what happened. At this point in time the only person who liked me was the principal. People made fun of me a number of times. I was quiet most of the time and withdrawn. they would constantly call me names and it used to bother me, but I soon started to ignore them all. My 5th grade teacher listened to what my Kindergarten teacher said and labeled me a problem child. It was so annoying. I got along with one boy who knew me from second grade. I didn't consider us friends but he thought I was his very good friend. There was a boy who liked me, but we didn't get along well. He used to tap me and it bothered me. He tapped me on my shoulder once and I was trying to ignore him, I just got upset and punched him in the face. The principal just told me I have to control myself, and let it go.


I was ostracized at lunch time. I couldn't sit at the table with the boys, they bothered me too much. Boys are bullies. I sat with the girls usually with one other boy but the girls were just as annoying and pushed me out eventually. I mostly sat at an empty lunch table made to accommodate 20 people. I did the same thing in Kindergarten and first grade. 


In my last year I started getting really bad grades. I didn't care about work anymore and was more interested in what I was interested in, so I focussed on that. At the end of the year I graduated and won a few awards. I had the highest standard test scores for English and Math in the state for Elementary students. I took a few pictures with my parents while everyone else were taking pictures with their friends. I had none but one boy, who sat at the girls table, asked to take a picture with me. I said yes, the picture was taken. We went out to eat, me and my parents, and that was the end of my Elementary life. Sadly Junior High started and a minor hell.

Monday, September 20, 2010

Faces

I can't read expressions. It's a pretty typical problem. I was speaking to my cousin yesterday and he made a face that I didn't understand. Shortly after I laughed a fake laugh of course, but then I had to think about it. I don't think my laugh was correct and I spent a long time going over in my head his expression. I get so frustrated when I can't read expressions, I rarely can anyway, but it still bothers me. I'm a very analytical person, and I calculate everything I'm going to do based off the situation. If I can't gather information from an expression I don't know how to react. I end up pausing at times in the middle of face to face conversation.

People have a tendency to say things while showing a face that doesn't correlate with what they're saying. At least I think so, so it just annoys me.

Friday, September 17, 2010

So Silly

Why do people call me to talk to me when they are in a bad mood? I don't get it. When I am in a bad mood I don't show that to other people, it makes no sense. I hate getting calls from a friend when they're in a bad mood, I just feel like I'm being attacked the whole time. I just don't get it.

Monday, September 13, 2010

So it's been a while since I've posted. I'll be posting 4th and 5th grade later. The two worst years of my school life lol.

While we wait for that I think I should post about something. I'm not really sure what to post, I'm bad at this "i'm going to randomly post!"

I think I'll do a series of post detailing the symptoms I have.

Wednesday, September 1, 2010

School Life - Second and Third Grade

Second grade wasn't that bad from what I can recall, which isn't much. I was made fun of at lunch time and recess daily for being weird. People pushed me aside and made little groups dedicated to disliking me. I didn't know why, I didn't talk to anyone and I tried to stay out of trouble as much as I could; however, it always round me. I enjoyed school at this point I had my same teacher from first grade and she was nice and worked with me. I still didn't have friends in the class but I did manage to make an acquaintance. We went out on multiple occasions, mostly because my grandmother knew his father. I believe this is the only reason. I didn't really consider us friends. I got along with a boy named Johnathan and his twin sister. He gave me his number and we talked at times. We both liked the spice girls. Eventually he stopped talking to me and started to insult me. I'm not sure why. This has happened with many of my acquaintances. They would suddenly start disliking me and ignore me and cut ties. I all the long oblivious to what just happened.

In school I was the good student. I scored in every subject, with the exception of social skills. My teachers thought I was some disorder since I appeared antisocial. I don't see how they thought that. In the beginning I tried to make friends and talk to people, it just never worked out. By the age of 9 I began to form anxiety to social situations.

I also made an acquaintance named Gary. I didn't like him much, but he talked to me and was polite, unlike everyone else.

Third grade was the LAST good year. It's kind of sad to look back and say for 12 years I've had issues dealing with others.

Third grade was one of the better years. I still had the same class form first and second grade so I slowly started to get along with more people. I would say most of my class stopped making so much fun of me. Some still did, but it wasn't so bad. I enjoyed classes and that was the year that I started my love for English and creative writing. I still hated recess and lunch and I would try to get to stay with the teacher at those times but most of the times that never happened. There was a girl who liked me. I waved and said hello and went on my way. I made the mistake of holding her hand in gym class, I think she misread what happened. I held her hand because we were in a line and the last time I was in a line I held hands. School trip.

There were a number of people I still had issues with. At recess they would gang up on me, and attack me. I would retaliate. I would always get in trouble. I would explain what happened but I was always the one who was wrong. If I was being attacked by several people I shouldn't push them or hit them and then go tell the teacher. I would go and tell the teacher, even if I'm in a position where I can't.

My parents were called in on multiple occasions. The teachers would say I probably have several mental problems which just annoyed my parents. I was a quiet boy who was intelligent and was often picked on.

I enjoyed my teacher, she was extremely nice. That's all I really have to say about her.

So yeah that's really about it.

Computer downage

My computer was down. That's pretty much it.